kak sweet dah cop adek adam nih, neil lambert..........siap posting kat blog dier lagi tapi posting kak sweet kena erased pasal dier nengok blog kak sweet ader banner boikot israel kot
Originally posted by alyssasarah at 8-4-2009 23:19
kak sweet dah cop adek adam nih, neil lambert..........siap posting kat blog dier lagi tapi posting kak sweet kena erased pasal dier nengok blog kak sweet ader banner boikot israel kot
a'ah...yg ksweet cakap agaknya memang betul dia orang ni jews tu kan
Do you know I almost did not get in? Okay, slight exaggeration. But they made me wait! In a line! With people! That's what happens when you're the sub -- you're not on the list. I tried to drop names -- Whitney Pastorek, Adam Vary -- but to no avail. Heck, I could've dropped Adam Lambert's name and it still wouldn't have worked, because the people who were "with Simon Cowell" were also standing at the CBS studio gate, in line ... behind me.
But you know what? The most interesting things happen when plans go awry. Like maybe while you're cooling your heels, Sinbad comes hobbling toward you on crutches. Yep, comedian, A Different World star, bodyguard for Hillary Clinton under Bosnian sniper fire -- that Sinbad. You know I just had to say something.
Me: Why are you on crutches?
Sinbad: I blew out my knee.
Me: I'm sorry.
Sinbad: It's all good. It's go'n' be okay!
Me: Feel better.
Okay, I said we had a conversation. I didn't say it was a good one. Anyway, the nice Fox lady came to rescue me, whisking me through secret entrances known only to a privileged few...thousand. But guess who I passed on the way? Smiling George Huff, from season 3 of TV's American Idol! I swear, he grinned at me like he knew me. So, again, I spoke up: "Why are you so happy?" Him: "I don't know!" God bless him, we should all go through life that way. Not four seconds later, nice Fox lady and I sailed past Ray Liotta, and let me assure you that he's one scary bastadge in person. He should get a little Huff in him, smile more.
Finally, I was able to take my seat. Liotta wasn't that far away from me. I heard Lauren Conrad and Lo Bosworth were in the house (and I'm just gonna keep pretending that I don't know who they are, because in a perfect world I wouldn't). Because I was late, everything was already in place: the spinning Idol globes that they stole from Metropolis were already in orbit. The swaybots had long been herded into twin pits on the floor, which seems like a fire hazard. And Cory the warm-up guy was just getting warmed up. He plucked people from the audience to go onstage. He made nice, middle-aged white people shake their groove thangs. (Truth be told, they were better dancers than Cory.) Fortunately, stage manager Debbie informed us that we were live to the East Coast in seven minutes.
Then, it all happened just this way: Kara came out to polite, restrained screams. The Idols made their way to the stage to mass hysteria, starting with Adam and ending with Scott. Randy got love from the swaybots on his way in, followed by Paula's brisk sashay to her seat. (I'm not sure you could fully appreciate this on television, but she was wearing a tutu. No, a tutu. No, she did it on purpose.) Then, ladies and gentleman, the man of the hour: Simon Cowell! That's Simon Cowell! Wait, he still didn't walk in. Let's make the lights do that crazy sweep around the audience to amp up the anticipation. Okay, again: Simon Cowell! No? Still no? Can somebody find Simon please, he missed his entrance. Okay, then cue Ryan. No, wait, here's Simon. Finally. Apparently, somebody thinks they can show up 20 seconds till air time, late for his own dang intro.
Ooh, snap! Simon just stopped to talk to Randy and Paula. Yeah, just Randy and Paula...while Kara sat the judges table ... talking to no one. Awkward. But you know who Simon chatted up more than anyone in the whole wide audience? Paula. They flirted, they finger-wagged back in forth. (I have no idea what that means, but don't most couples have cute, nonsensical inside jokes like that?) They R in luv, y'all! In my head, anyway. It would explain so much: the love taps, the sexual tension, the fact that they must have conspired not to use actual baby pictures in the opening montage. Seriously, someone, somewhere has photographic evidence of Simon Cowell in nappies. We want!
Anyway, it was time for the performances. While Danny Gokey remixed "Stand By Me," Kara was getting a message (oh goody, someone does talk to her!), while Randy head bobbed his way through. I'd say more about the Goke, but the giant orange sign reading "Minnesota Loves Danny" blocked my view. Hmph, the people holding the other orange sign, "Gokey's No Jokey" were kind enough not to hoist it in front of me. They were raised right. Once the Minnesotans lowered their billboard, I could see Simon and Paula chatting away again. I love fake love. Too bad it's so fleeting, because as you know, the instant they go to commercial the judges are up like they all have to pee. When you get to be a big, fancy star, nobody dares to tell you to go before the show or you're going to have to hold it. Ooh, we're back in 60 seconds.
While Kris settled on the Stool of Anticipation, Cory found a birthday girl. Ms. Twenty-two Today planned to hit a Snoop Dogg concert at 9 o'clock. Cory: "He'll go on around 11." Cory, you sir, are a wit. Anyway, enough from you, warm-up dude. With 10 seconds to air the judges were just filing back in. Even as Ryan came back from commercial, they were still getting settled. Where do they go?! Would it not be easier to just sit still for a freaking hour?! They're like wiggly pre-schoolers hopped up on Pixie Stix. Meanwhile, poor Kris had to fight his way through the swaybots to get to his spot and his geetar. It must be said that in the shiny blue Idol Thunderdome, he sounded strangely muffled. That, or my hearing aids didn't like the frequency. (No, I'm not joking. Sometimes they spazz a tad in loud places.) As he finished, and just as I was thinking that from the back Simon looks like a Marine ca. 1959, Randy spoke to Kara. Phew! For a second it looked like she might be the girl on the playground with cooties. But he had her back -- and of course, Simon and Paula once again had their heads together.
Speaking of the backs of people's heads, it's fascinating what you can learn -- particular from Randy. When his bobs, he's digging a performance. Occasionally, it'll pop up when someone does a clever riff, like a kid hearing the ice cream man coming up the street. When Anoop actually came with it, putting his own sauce on "True Colors," you could tell Randy heard the jingly promise of a red-white-and-blue Bomb Pop heading his way. With Karaoke Lil, it was the sad head-shake of resignation. No jingle, no Fudgesicle. It was a dull string of hits and misses so monotonous, I couldn't blame the judges when they all started to flee after Allison's capable take on "I Can't Make You Love Me." But they were thwarted -- at least for a moment. Reality TV evil genius Mike Darnell stopped them mid-stride, imparting some sort of pressing news. Then he ushered them out for Something Important. Odds are, we'll never know what. It'll be that last case that sticks with us, long after we've handed in our guns and badges and retired to our cabin in the woods in a lovely town the tourists haven't discovered yet. Try not to let it haunt you.
At least Cory was having fun. While the judges were out he found some women holding a "Teachers Hot 4 Cowell" sign and teased them for ditching school. He pouted that a girl from Santa Monica wouldn't talk to him, then punished her by telling everyone that since she wouldn't make nice, he wouldn't give her an iPod Touch. Instead, Sammy from San Diego walked away with it -- as did a 9-year-old girl, a boy who couldn't decide if he was 7 or 8, and Ms. Twenty-two Today (so yeah, she went to Idol, saw Snoop Dogg, and got an iPod).
I looked down to take notes on all the iPod Touching, then looked up to see the judges magically back in their seats, just in time for Adam Lambert's brilliant take on Tears for Fears as the show went into overtime. That's when I witnessed something rare -- the back of Simon Cowell's 1950's Marine head rising up to give Adam a standing ovation. You might have heard me shriek. It's entirely possible -- I was lost in the moment. And then it was over. Paula waded into Swaybot Swamp. Kara and Randy split. Simon was gone so fast that next time I walk into the Idoldome I'm going to check for trapdoors. Then the Idol Guard directed us out of the back of the theater, onto the street, and back into anonymity. Just as I was marveling at the juxtaposition, Celebrity Apprentice provocateur/America's Got Talent judge Piers Morgan walked by. Him I didn't talk to.
What'd you think, PopWatchers, should George Huff get an Idol reunion walk-on? Who's got a theory on why Ray Liotta was in the house? Is there anyone (like me) who'd actually prefer to watch the show from the comfort of their own couch? Share with the class, please.
Post time 8-4-2009 11:05 PM
