where to start?

tickmeoff

guys,just enough to say that I recently went through a lot of tribulations in my life. I was previously christian but i quitted believing that because I do not find that religion suits me.



thanx. feel sad. too much sadness in this world.

[ Last edited by  tickmeoff at 8-5-2009 12:19 ]

Life is what is in your head... If you ask your brain stupid questions, it will answer stupid things. If you asks constructively, it will reply ingeniously.

To live a better and meaningful life, we're not bound by what we did but of what we do from now on.

I do not know how the Buddhas view homosexuals. But I do know the Lord Buddha had accepted a prostitute, a man who work by carrying human wastes, murderer, unfilial sons and daughters, ... sinners they are in the eyes of the society.

"Watch your thoughts; they become your words. Watch your words; they become your actions. Watch your actions; they become your habits. Watch your habits; they become your character. Watch your character for it will become your destiny" ~Frank Outlaw

Search within you whether or not you really need a religion to help you chart your life... and next lives. Try learning the originals. Not those yi guan dao or felon goon. It'll twist you out of your life.

Originally posted by tickmeoff at 25-1-2006 06:48 PM
guys,just enough to say that I recently went through a lot of tribulations in my life. I was previously christian but i quitted believing that because I do not find that religion suits me.

I am  ...

Brother,
http://www.lioncity.net/buddhism ... eb&showforum=25

www.buddhanet.net


May you be well and happy!

Sephiroth

Buddhism advised the followers not to indulge in sexual affairs - premarital and "odd relationships". Even those who are married, sexual relationships should be more to a control events and such.

Which means you cannot be a Buddhist and follow its principles if you don't have what it takes to let go of your sexual (odd) intendecies. :no:

Execise a lot, do meditations and Yoga and take up sports - it will help you control your mind and body and obtain better physical aspects of yourself and promote you to become a better Buddhist. Don't come to Buddhism looking for an excuse to continue indulge in your behaviour. :no:

ariyamusafir

Originally posted by tickmeoff at 25-1-2006 06:48 PM
guys,just enough to say that I recently went through a lot of tribulations in my life. I was previously christian but i quitted believing that because I do not find that religion suits me.

I am  ...

The first most important thing is to be filial and respectful to your parents. Next, you should reverently believe in the triple jewel, third, abstain from killing and instead, liberate the living. Fourth, eat vegetarian and practise giving. These are the first few advice by the buddha to all, in the The Sutta on Cause and Effect in the Three Periods of Time

To cease from all evil, to cultivate good, to purify one's mind: This is the advice of all Buddha. Dhammapada verse 183; Buddha Vagga

[ Last edited by ariyamusafir at 28-1-2006 12:44 AM ]

tickmeoff

thanks for the fast reply. have been talking with some of my buddhist friends also. Some of them tell me soemthing about reading mantra and sutra... can u help me to understand this? it looks a bit regimented to me, I dont read chinese, and how in any way reciting monologues will help in any way?

thanx for reply. Happy CNY to all. sorry for my ignorance.

i am doing some personal research and reading on buddhism. It is a beautiful doctrine and very logical.

[ Last edited by tickmeoff at 28-1-2006 11:05 AM ]

ariyamusafir

Originally posted by tickmeoff at 28-1-2006 10:43 AM
thanks for the fast reply. have been talking with some of my buddhist friends also. Some of them tell me soemthing about reading mantra and sutra... can u help me to understand this? it looks a bit ...

Happy Chinese New Year. My advice as an ordinary man. Do not mindlessly be attached to anything. This is adviced by the Buddha. Desire and Craving is the root cause of sorrow/suffering. Sex as a desire has no equal. My own views - to cease from this desire and craving so hard to overcome, one must use meditation. Many people misunderstand the meaning of meditation. Many films do it as sitting crossed legged and chant oum, oum which is not true. Meditation simply means to be mindful, to be aware. Meditation can be done while sitting, lying down and even walking. When you are meditating, when you are mindful, when you are aware of your sexual desire, when your concentration is deep, you absorb into it, become DETACHED from it. Example, pain. When you feel physical pain, you meditate on it, mindful of it, aware of it, without discrimination, when your concentration is deep, you become absorb into it, you become DETACHED from it. Then you still feel the feeling of pain, but the situation is different from previously. Previously, you feel the feeling of pain, you are suffering from it as a result and also, you feel great discomfort. However after meditating on it, after being detached from it, you still feel the feeling of pain, but you no longer feel it as a great discomfort which causes you to feel very bad but you feel pain as it truely is, you understand the feeling of pain as it truely is but you no longer become affected by it. This is what I know and understand. Correct me if I am wrong.

ariyamusafir

Originally posted by tickmeoff at 28-1-2006 02:29 PM
interesting. I have always feel sad/ despair... but sometimes when i sit down and think about it, the doctrines of buddha.. i somehow feel a bit better, but the relief is somewhat temporary, then i ...

Great to hear that. If you do not wish to get married, you can turn down in a nice way rather then pitting yourself against your grandmother whenever she raise up the issue.... see, me too just learn something when I type the previous sentence, however, mine is a different issue. Anyway, I will try to give yousomething in the near future. I plan to post the dhammapada English version here in the near future, hopefully not long after chinese new year.

You say that the relief is temporary, which to a certain point, is true yet it is untrue. This is my own view/knowledge which I might be wrong and do correct me so if I am such. Why it is short live, because like while I was in the UK, is so cold but I do not on the heater. Temperature is about 12 degree celcius yet I bath with cold water, but sometimes I really do not wish too. Actually, it is such, that when we meditate as a beginner, during the time where we have good concentration, and when we are dtached we are free from our suffering though, example we still feel the pain, yet we feel it as it truely is rather then it is a burden or discomfort to us. However, due to our constant idle mind, it is normally such case where we return to the state of idle or non-awareness, non-mindfulness. When one practices anapanasatti, one will know. We breath in breath out, we make an effort to concentrate, we take note of it, but later due to lack of concentration, our mind start to idle. While counting 1-8 for example, many times we will observe that we suddenly forgot we count until where already.

However, for your case I believe is different from the case above but when you practice meditation, I believe there is a possibility where you may encounter such problems. For your case I believe, you find temporary relief in the Buddha's teachings because you found the Buddha's teaching to be peaceful, a method to rid yourself of your suffering, because you feel towards the Triple Jewel, yet at the same time it is your sense of guilt and remorse of your misdeeds that made you feel bad for what you have done (this might be your case as I do not know why you feel sad and despair). Sense of guilt is good to prevent you from doing what is wrong. However, it will also be a burden to you in moving forward for the better if once you have commited a crime, and you have already regretted it, will not commit it in the future, yet feeling guilty and always pondering issues of the past and thus worrying over it, and be in moody. See??? Feeling of guilt is a good tool to make sure that you once gone astray, will return back to the right track, but once you are on the right track, you must learn to tackle your feeling of guilt.

Another would be, dear friend is that when you feel relieved when you think about the Buddha's teachings, is because you know it is true, but yet after that you begin to go back to your old self, and start to ponder back your problems, become ATTACHED to it thus feeling sorrow/suffer because of it. Aspire to practice is one issue, really practicing is another. Though inter-related, yet different. Aspire will make you choose to practise but wether you succeed or not in practising it will depend on your determination.

Sorry IF any of my remarks is inaccurate as I am just a layman.

ariyamusafir

Originally posted by tickmeoff at 28-1-2006 08:57 PM
I feel sad because I will not be able to lead a life that everyone else is living. It's more to mental torture i am experiencing. and how society look down on unmarried people as failure in life. e ...

Oh... so that is what which is troubling you.... small matter lah... no prob. I ingat something else. Tell you what, the most important thing in this world is Fillial Peity. Remember, that your parents are more important then anything else. Hard to do are things which are not beneficial, difficult indeed to do are things that are benficial and good.

I give you verse in the dhammapada in which you will understand totally what I will be trying to tell you.

Sahassa Vagga

103. Though one should conquer a thousand times a thousand men in battle, he who conquers his own self, is the greatest of all conquerers.

104, 105. Self-conquest is, indeed, far greater than the conquest of all other folk; neither a god nor a Gandhabba, nor Mara with Brahma, can win back the victory of such a person who is self-subdued and ever lives in restraint.


Please note that this is not forcing you or what. In the end, it is up to you to choose to do it or not. I have no say on that.

Atta Vagga

160. Oneself, indeed, is one's saviour, for what other saviour would there be? With oneself well controlled, one obtains a saviour difficult to find.

161. By oneself alone is evil done; it is self-born, it is self-caused. Evil grinds the unwise as a diamond grinds a hard gem.

163. Easy to do are things that are hard and not beneficial to oneself, but very very difficult, indeed to do is that which is beneficial and good.

165. By oneself, indeed, is evil done; by oneself is one defiled. By oneself is evil left undone; by oneself, indeed, is one purified. Purity and impurity depend on oneself. No one purifies another.

Sephiroth

by tickmeoff   

I recently had the chance to talk to one buddhist who is also a gay, and got to know his perspective on this issue of homosexuality.

If you want to learn properly about Buddhism, Talk to people who practise it properly also, NOT to people who indulge in Worldly desires and sins and talk as if they live a holy life. :no:

Proper path to Knowledge starts from people who live with Knowledge.

In Buddhism - ALL SEXUAL PERVERSION (except Marriage between Man and Woman) IS PROHIBITED - both the Sangha members as well as Laymen, regardless of what you may heard.

ariyamusafir

Originally posted by tickmeoff at 19/7/2006 09:50
you seem to have a little bit of problems with gays dont you? from your post you are not  free of your prejudices too. I thought being buddhist one must not discriminate. I come here to seek help a ...

tickmeoff, we here, including vijaya are used to his attacking remarks here. I remember I used to have heated arguments with him as he always accused me of being a fake. Just be patience will you? If you don't like it, then just let him post what he wants, if breach forum rules, credit deductions, if no breach, it is his right to post as is ours. He had tried to prevent me as a normal forumer to post, but failed.

Anyway, just want to tell you a thing of the past. I believe with your vigor, by now you should have know many terms such as arahant (buddhist saint), bodhisatta, etc. Do you know one of the most famous MAHA-arahant, his real name is Ahimsaka, his nick-name is Angulimala. Angulimala meaning man with a thousand angulis, or fingers/thumbs (not sure on this one). Well, he was a good man until one day, he felt he had no choice, he murdered people for their angulis so that he may fulfill something which you will know later. Even to the extend of murdering his own beloved mother and later upon seeing the Buddha, abondoned his plans to take his mother but the buddha instead. The buddha purposedly made the trip upon seeing the fact that he is about to kill his own mother on that very day... After their encounter soon, he gave up and seek ordination, he soon became a maha-Arahant.... more stories on this one but I have great reverence and respect for maha-Arahant Angulimala and take him as one of my role model. By telling this tale, this fact history, you know what I am trying to say.... but of course, doesn't mean that you must go around murder and do harm to others and do unto yourself then regret then stop. Now you know, now you don't do it and you stop from past misdeed.

Also, a tale worth noting is the past life of another maha-Arahant, a chief deciple of the Buddha, maha-Mogallana. He sufered for soooo long in the hells in one of his previous life before he attained nibbana and no more rebirths.

Regarding the monk who speaks english. As far as I know, there are many monks who are well versed in English in Malaysia. One of them being one of a chief monk, Dr. K. sri Dhammanada, a Sri Lankan who is residing in a temple, I am not sure which but I believe is somewhere near brickfields which I may be wrong. You can go to this website:

http://www.tipitaka.net/pali/ebo ... ok=0004&page=00

for he post articles in there. Try it.

http://www.tipitaka.net/pali/

Sephiroth

by tickmeoff   

  you seem to have a little bit of problems with gays dont you? from your post you are not  free of your prejudices too. I thought being buddhist one must not discriminate. I come here to seek help and guidance, NOT some bigotted views. Perhaps I did not mention that he lived the life as best as he could, keeping the precepts, and he had only a single partner in his life. he donated to the temples and live a life of sex abstinence other than his current partner.

Is his "partner" another male? Then that IS Sexual Perversion according to Buddhist Laws. There is NO discrimination, JUST facts - Take it or leave it. :no:

I don't know Pure Land Buddhist ... maybe it is like Christianity which says all sort of things but implements NOTHING. But TRUE Buddhism DO NOT ALLOW HOMOSEXUALITY or Sexual Perversion, except by MARRIAGE WITH OPPOSITE SEX. THAT IS FACT and THAT IS PERCEPT.

Have a nice day. ff:

Sephiroth

Hmph ... ;)

Difference between a Buddhist and a Pretender (to be Buddhist) is - Buddhist KNOWS the Precepts of Buddha and LIVE by it. Pretenders do not bother and live like ignorant while pretending (for sake of themselves and others who look at them) to be Buddhist.

Truth.8

ariyamusafir replied at 28-1-2006 10:59 PM
Oh... so that is what which is troubling you.... small matter lah... no prob. I ingat something  ...

desire and Craving is the root cause of sorrow/suffering. Sex as a desire has no equal

than why it was created? it was created for what purpose? in my view , simple
desire and Craving- Sex  need to be moderate  not over the limit
if one too obsessed with materials-desire-craving -sex....it leads suffering -pain

one example having sex with different partners....it leads to STD....this over the limit...same goes to others

GOD made it for simple -moderate - THINK